A Pale Pink City

My Life in Fiction

Tag: rosy retrospection (Page 1 of 2)

Paperthin Hymns & Speeding Cars at 9 In The Afternoon

OMG so while on Diamond Head, there was this super obnoxious kid blasting music from his backpack.

And one of the chords are just so familiar that I’m like, OMG and then the singing starts and I’m all of a sudden transported to about 15 years ago when I’d spend days at my dad’s store, you know?

But he wanders away and all I’ve heard is “helloo~~helloo~~”

OMG it drives me crazy that I can’t remember the lyrics afterwards or even the artist.

I come home with the same chords going through my head over and over again…

I spend like all day on Monday going through 2000s alternative music Vevos trying to find this song-I know, I have no life, sorry but hey, this was important to me.

Finally, I get to Red Hot Chili Peppers and I’m not, noo I’m like a really big fan of the RHCP, no way it’s them because I’d know.

What do you know?? It’s RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS! OTHERSIDE!

And it’s not even Hello, hello, it’s HOW LONG, HOW LONG!!

OMG

I was so disappointed in myself LOL

I mean, I used to have the RHCP in my old Toshiba computer, back when I used to d/l with napster and kazaa and limewire

Gosh.

But because of my going crazy I ended up rediscovering all of my old songs from back in the day. Have I ever missed High School as much as I do now??

I couldn’t tell.

Like I used to be a closet angst, you know? Because you know, hormones and stuff. So I used to listen to all these angsty and angry songs and it just…

Anyways.

Then yesterday, me and HJ watched The Holiday which is from 2006 (the year I graduated) and OMG the songs! It had like the Killers, Frou Frou (let go was MY SONG) and just…wow.

I kinda miss high school. Isn’t that incredible? I mean I haven’t missed high school at all since I’ve graduated and to suddenly wish for those days, it’s really something.

I guess I’m missing my youth, having no real responsibilities, no pressures to get married-ugh that’s the worst one

I mean, seriously, even grandma and grandpa are starting to pressure me, like, why don’t you have a boyfriend?? You keep your eyes too high (basically a Korean phrase that says that my standards are ridiculously high)

Why can’t I have high standards?? We marry for keeps!!

What if I don’t really like him and marry him out of panic and fear of loneliness?? What if I’m stuck with him forever?!

I miss having all the time in the world to write and draw, I miss having summers off, I miss the mix of trepidation and excitement for the future

Growing up kinda sucks.

The only good thing is that now that I’m working I can afford nice things and vacations and I guess I have more independence but still.

It’s still very constrained, you know? And nice things get old super fast.

I’d rather still be the unfabulous, plain high schooler facing limitless possibilities instead of being stuck at the age of 28 in a job that’s not a career, generally unhappy with things and in a state of getting well, old.

See? Getting old is not natural. I mean if it was supposed to happen why is it then our natural inclination to fight and resist the aging process??

Sigh.

Memories like embers keep us warm

– The Hush Sound, Don’t Wake Me Up

 

maestro-hans zimmer

That song as well as maxence cyrin’s where is my mind has been pretty much playing on repeat for the past few days.

And i am also enjoying immensely the soundtrack from theory of everything- that movie was just really touching and its moved me quite apparently lol

Lately i’ve been on an instrumental music high- not just movie osts but also classics such as dvorak and tchaikovsky and fauvre and gershwin and modern composers like flaming heart and 316 and epitone project and acoustic cafe to just name a few.

And just a few weeks earlier it was all about the 2000s pop stuff that i’d listen to in high school but yeah i was feeling pretty nostalgic atm

(But it must not only be me because digimon 2015?? Ummm clearly thats for the nostalgic 20 somethings who never got over that absolute horrendous ending of 02!!! Alslsldjfhskakdjfh it gets me angry just to think of it!!)

Anyways, last night, the freds had a small group over as y and a m were visiting in town!

Omg i’ve missed them dearly!! It was so nice to have them back, no joke they are the reason i was able to join chinese in the first place because prior to meeting y during service my dad was all like, u have to go to meeting with ur family!

But since meeting y i guess he thought i would be ok so i joined the very next month!

But yeah its pretty cool to see the different waves of mahwah/morris chinese and its growth, like yest i met l d who i’d always heard about but never actually met lol

And our current hall has so many new people that i feel like i don’t know half the people there, no joke.

But it was so very nice to see old familiar faces like Z and C W and B M and most of all my dear L M.

It was nice to catch up on each others lives.

Man.

I hate to be so mopey but man i wish i was back in time or had a time machine.

I’d be so much different!

And i’d like you while you where still with us and not after you leave lol.

Why is that??

Why do i like people once they are too far to be a feasible romantic interest?

Grrrr, my stupid fear of commitment!!

Well…

-mr. Darcy is adorbs!

-grasshopper- hope u dont have a crush on her, i mean u said she was dating a diff bethelite, i wish all the best for her with that bethelite lol!!

-definitely hope u are still single, lol i have this horrible tendency to crush on taken men inadvertently! 🙁

-size 11.5 shoes!!

-please get instagram! Or maybe not because then i’d be so tempted to get another smart phone instead of a regular flip phone as planned

-hope u meant it when u said u were single, omg im starting to sound creepy like overly attached girlfriend puhahaha

But yes, please do comeback to our hall if only for a visit and do so on a weekend when i’m actually around! So we can spend the whole weekend together- come to think of it, how’d u know i’d be working that weekend?? Did u ask someone about me?!?! Omg!!

-i will come to visit u once ive lost some more weight and cleared my skin.

And wow. Yesterday was such a pleasant suprise as i wasnt expecting u to be there but yet there u were.

Omg so glad i decided to go!

And z!! He’s my original boy confidante, i mean i could ask him about boys and he’d be truthful about what he thought of them so it was delightful to see u again and with ur beautiful beautiful wife- grrr why does she have to look so perfect?!?

Anyways.

I should really work out and stuff….

And work on my chinese….

Omg.

L BEAR I MISS YOU SO!!

Year End Review: 2014

So 2014 was a busy year, it flew by super quick…

Let’s break it down month by month:

January:

The parents, the grandparents and my 2nd Aunt and Uncle went on a first class trip to Cancun, Mexico and OMG we the kids (pretty much my sister and I and the cousins) were hit by a gigantic mess!!

Like literally the DAY THAT THEY LEFT there was a gas main leak/electrical fire under Main St where of course the main problem was at my uncle’s store and my dad’s store.

How does that even happen?? I mean they are close but still a good 100ft. away from each other!!

So we open our store and are immediately hit by a blast of fumes- gasoline fumes to be exact- and our eyes are immediately watery.

PLUS there’s a haze of smoke all over the store.

I panic immediately- we open all the doors and i get on the phone with PSE&G-don’t even ask why I didn’t just call the FD right away but I called PSE&G who of course, immediately told us to evacuate the building and call 911.

So in the coldest days of the year ( like 17F) we are outside literally chattering from the cold while the FD arrives.

They come and immediately cordon off the entire area around our store and start investigating.

Meanwhile our cousin B is like outside because his own store is w/o electricity and is freezing and w/e no other stores are open on Main St. because there is no power in the entire street. WTH?

Finally like 3 hrs/later the FD and the police and the PSE&G people are unable to find the source of the gas- they place these gigantic fans outside our store and bring the levels down to safe levels and gives us the ok to return to the store.

By this time it is like 1pm and we realize-OMG the internet is not working i.e no credit card transactions.

So now i’m going nuts, on the phone with Cable/Optimum trying to get our internet operational and in the midst of this crazyiness, suprise suprise, we get a call from our parents telling us to check on B and J as there is something going on in their store.

OMG due to the power being shut off, the pipes BURST. alsdkfjslakkjflasjg!!! And because the cousins were panicked, they didn’t know what to do so they called the Fire Department AGAIN!!

And they deemed it a fire hazard as the water from the burst pipes ran into the electrical wiring.

aldkfjalskkdjflkasghlkdsjflksj!!! why is this happening now?!?!

so we call the parents in a panic, they call our 4th uncle who happens to be an electrical technician (or used to be in Korea) but by now the PD and FD have declared the building a fire hazard requiring tons of permits and construction-and because of that we find out that Casa Bonita is going to be closed for at least 3 days.

ALDKJRLSKDJGLJ.

Poor B sits in a corner and cries. I cry for him too inside.

And the rest of the week until the parents return is spent trying to rectify the situation- can you believe i almost lost my mind trying to fix the internet situation and it was just that the router was broken due to the power outage on day one. what do you know, as soon as i put a new router on, the internet works.

1 day before the parents return.

figures.

And the rest of January is pretty much a blur, trying to get my uncle’s store reopened. 🙁

February

Pretty much a slow month. My sisters and I continue to go to Carmen’s for exercise with A.

I start aggressively job hunting and go to a few interviews.

Everyone only wants to hire full time nurses.

I get called for an interview with Horizon BCBS and go all the way to Trenton.

I am hopeful but not really.

Otherwise it was super snowy.

I see JAF at Patterson one night while I am trying to check in, and he looks pretty spiffy.

March

 March I get a call and I’m hired by HBCBS for their MLTSS program!

Hurray! (whatever that is lol)

Its another busy month of service, we have the campaign for the memorial, C/O visit and then a circuit assembly.

C gets married to F!! Or JF lol and becomes CF 선 that fell apart as soon as i got there THANK GOODNESS lol but i was pretty sick the entire time i was there. 🙁

But just staying in LA was wonderful, even though the plane trip was pretty arduous.

This is when I get a mini crush on KB lolol omg I’m so easy!!

Dinner at Mitsuwa after Sunday and guess who??

Also i go to LA with my dad and J because of a

April

First day on the job.

The first couple of days are pretty easy. And lots of fun.

And i have a little gathering at my place for the Ws who got baptized all toghether and that’s pretty much it, service and work, service and work. 🙂

May

May is pretty much the same old, turns out there is a 2 month orientation period in HBSBC which is pretty much HBCBS paying us to sit in an office for 8 hrs/week and learn about corporate policies and benefits and everything is always changing and i’m always lost lol

And month i go to Patterson and take care of a dear brother who was actively dying.

It was very sad. That is all.

And then i went to the Memorial Day BBQ and got super mad at Sultana as previously stated on this blog lol

June

1 week of training down in Trenton which was tiring but atleast very informative.

Then the international conventions to the US started which was exciting for all of us- although it was when the KOREANS came.

UGH.

Please refer to the entry expressed written for them.

And X and W M came to stay also with us which was a ton fun. 🙂

But man those Koreans were pretty annoying and cause a bit of a rift btw us and my parents but that’s old hat now.

July

Start of the MLTSS program!
OMG i just want to poke my eyeballs out the workload seems crazy!!

But at the same time its not too bad lol

And I threw the baby shower for MJJ 🙂

And it was adorable and kind of a different baby shower from what i’m used to but it was still tons of fun 🙂

Mom and dad went to Viriginia- oh there was a bit of a hubbabaloo concerning who was going to go where and what not but umm w/e  why is L inviting people who aren’t even in Teaneck Korean Congregation when she’s in the getting invited 쳐지 anyways?? I don’t understand.

August

2 Regional Conventions right after another! Korean and Chinese!! 🙂

And still pretty busy but still slower than it was in July.

And K and J’s goodbye party as they were moving to China.

September

Hmmm…can’t really remember much from september.

I went to the gardens for sculpture with my mom and J (sorry H!!) and it was a lovely day/evening.

The Amazing Race.

Gilead Graduation

October

Annual meeting. 🙂

H’s suprise party! and A’s suprise bridal shower!

Dress shopping for A’s wedding-once my sisters and I drove out to NY to get a dress after meeting lol but i settled (or rather reached lol!) for this beautiful Erin Fetherston dress

Mom and Dad went to Hawaii and thoroughly enjoyed themselves 🙂

November

A+D wedding! Korean circuit assembly! & Chinese circuit assembly, i think??

c/o visit!

Erhmmm i don’t remember?? lol this is kinda sad.

Obligatory Thanksgiving w/family.

December

Family night!

1 week and some days off 🙂

and busy busy busy bee

 

That pretty much sums up my 2014.

You can totally tell i got lazy/tired of typing.

Also, 2014 was the year of the deaths 🙁

-ㅇㄱㅈ 자매’s death due to colo-rectal cancer

-ㅈ자매’s husband’s passing due to stage IV lung cancer (in 3 weeks too!) 🙁

-FR due to cancer

-ㅅㅇ언니’s dad’s death due to MI/old age

-J 오빠’s dad’s death due to MI

-RL due to dementia

and like 5 of my members but hipaa so enough said.

Here’s to a happy, satisfying 2015!!

Afterall this is MY year. the year I turn 27.

27!!!

 

OMG

 

xoxo

 

 

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